letters of desperation
Dear Mom,
Man, I’ve been really down lately. We just got our grades back for the last two modules, and I’m not doing too hot I’d like to give the excuse “oh, but everyone is failing there exams!” But that’s a stupid excuse. I don’t know what to do anymore, because I’ve never studied this hard in my life! And then to not get results? To not even pass the exam?
I’m so tired, and so depressed ALL the time. And I feel like crying ALL the time, but I have to put all these feelings in this tiny box just to function on a day to day basis. It gets harder and harder to wake up each day to go to lectures because I just feel so discouraged
I don’t know what to do mom :( I had an relatively easy time last year. But there just seems to be too much information to absorb this semester. We have 14 lectures sometimes in the span of 4 days only, with 8 hours of lectures each day and then every Monday there’s an exam. I have no weekend anymore. I see the coffeeshop baristas more than I see my friends. Even spending 3 hours on a Saturday with dad is a sacrifice, because as time passes I feel guilty thinking that I could have spent the last hour studying rather than doing nothing.
It’s coming home to an empty (messy!) condo with no one to hug and feeling like I’m a million miles from anyone that really cares that this used-to-be smart girl feel like she doesn’t know a single thing anymore.
I miss you I’m sorry (in advance) for my grades, I’ll keep trying though.
